Childhood ends for everyone, but if you experienced trauma at a young age, you might have been forced to grow up way too young. As an adult, we can look back at our past with sadness, grieving the ways we were prevented from being the children we were. I see “Bigger Than The Whole Sky” as an ode to this grieving process - in addressing the fact that we never deserved the trauma we went through, we can let go of shame that we somehow deserved it.

In this episode, my guest, Marisa, of @littlebent_notbroken and I unpack the lyrics to “The Way I Loved You” from Taylor Swift’s album, Fearless (throwback!). We discuss our interpretations of the song through the lens of what it’s like to be in a new relationship after a toxic or abusive relationship. Some topics we cover in the episode are:

• missing someone even though they were toxic or harmful in your life.

• when dating after abuse feeling boring or lackluster compared to the high highs and low lows of a past relationships.

• why you’re attracted to the chase of someone inconsistent.

• what you learn from relationships that pair love with pain.

• and so much more!

In this episode, my guest Sara Aird of @breakingdowncptsd and I unpack the lyrics to “My Tears Ricochet” from Taylor Swift’s album, Folklore. We discuss our interpretations of the song through the lens of what it’s like to walk away from a toxic or abusive family system. Some topics we cover are the duality of loving people but knowing you need to walk away from them, feeling misunderstood for making boundaries, and creating your own home base.

In this episode, I unpack the lyrics of “peace” by Taylor Swift from the 2020 album, folklore, through the lens of being in a relationship when you’re a trauma survivor.

In this episode, my guest, Jessie, and I unpack the lyrics of “evermore” by Taylor Swift from the 2020 album, Evermore.

In this episode, we explore a realistic timeline of healing from an abusive relationship - because it’s usually not all sunshine and rainbows after you leave. This episode is about the aftermath: processing the trauma, trying to figure out what exactly happened, and the cycles of self-blame when the world tells you to get over something you can’t. We discuss the complex experience of freedom: feeling lost in addition to experiencing the loss of something that meant the world to us. Despite the darkness of grief, we unpack the parts of this song that point to the magic and power of survival.

In this episode, I unpack the lyrics of “The Great War” by Taylor Swift from the 2022 album, Midnights through the lens of inner child healing.

In this episode, my guest Ali Kates and I unpack the lyrics of “The Archer” by Taylor Swift from the 2019 album, Lover.

In this episode, we explore the desire to express anger and fight back as a trauma survivor after attempting to secure connection through fawning or performing doesn’t work. We shed light on the very real urge to self-sabotage during moments of intense dysregulation. We discuss finding your authentic self beneath the urge to fight, flight, and fawn. Finally, we highlight some of the struggles when it comes to being high functioning and basing your image on being strong and confident when you feel anything but.

In this episode, my guest Sallie Keena and I unpack the lyrics of “Delicate” by Taylor Swift from the 2017 album, Reputation.

In this episode, we delve into the intricacies of relationships, particularly for folks with anxious attachment styles. We explore the nuances between patterns of dropping everything for someone who isn't reciprocating enough and the thrill of a new crush, and the fragility of friendships turning into something more. We also examine the assumptions we make when our trauma has conditioned us to think we are "too much" for others.

In the episode, I recount my experience of experiencing sexual abuse as an adolescent in my first real relationship. I delve into the dynamics of being in an abusive partnership at a tender age, shedding light on the emotional coercion, violation of boundaries, and the yearning to be accepted. Additionally, the episode delves into the long-term repercussions of such trauma, including the burden of PTSD and grappling with resentment towards those who subjected you to such ordeals at a vulnerable time in your life.

In this episode, my guest Sara Aird of @breakingdowncptsd and I unpack the lyrics to “Death By A Thousand Cuts” from Taylor Swift’s album, Lover. We discuss our interpretations of the song, ranging from walking away from a toxic family after the accumulation of hurt becomes too much to ignore, to reckoning with the end of a “situationship” you thought was going to be more than it was.

In this episode, I unpack the lyrics of “Right Where You Left Me” by Taylor Swift from the 2020 album, Evermore. I discuss the unrelenting nature of heartbreak, the shame that arises when you aren’t able to “get over” something from the past, and how this song can be applied to the experience of trauma.

In this episode, I unpack the lyrics of “Midnight Rain” by Taylor Swift from the 2022 album, Midnights. I talk about what it feels like to outgrow a relationship and environment, to be a deep feeler in a superficial world, and the pain of leaving behind something that was good but not right.

In the first episode, I unpack the lyrics of “Mean” by Taylor Swift from the 2010 album, Speak Now to illustrate the process of emotional and verbal abuse. I discuss the repetitive nature of emotional abuse, why “giving up” is sometimes an important part of the healing process, and how it’s okay to be petty.